"I will not patronize any restaurant that does not post prices on their websites."
"OK, that's it. I'm canceling my subscription to the newspaper. If the newspaper won't get rid of Mark Streeter and his stupid childish cartoons, then I'm going to get rid of them. He needs to get a life and grow up."
"I don't like sports, 'Doonesbury' and most of the comics. Guess what I do? I turn the page."
"You know how useless my sports car would be in the mud? It's about how useless your jacked-up truck looks on the road."
"I was calling because I thought my subscription to the newspaper included two puzzles a day and here it is Thursday, and we only get one puzzle." (Editor's note: On Thursdays, one crossword puzzle runs in the Do section and the other in the Classifieds section.)
"OK folks, one more time: What part of the law do you not understand? It requires you to turn on your car headlights when it's pouring down rain. Come on, folks, get with it."
"So Trump passed his medical physical with flying colors. It's not his physical health we're worried about; everyone knows that. Check his head out the next time and see what happens."
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