"To the parents of the two kids who skateboard to school over the railroad on Route 17: Please have them wear some reflective gear. Drivers can't see them in the dark mornings. We don't need another child dying out here."

"Kensington Park is like my Grandma Ginger. Old, but not historic."

"The ABC television network in Savannah doesn't have HD?" (Editor's note: Yes, it does.)

"Bring back 98.3 Oldies! I'm on Delilah overload! And The River should have the John Tesh show. Come on Savannah, get with it!"

"This past week I had the pleasure of serving as a juror in Judge Timothy Walmsley's courtroom. It was a pleasure to serve under such a professional judge. It was a pleasure and an honor."

"If your objective in life is to meet a lot of stupid people, become a tattoo artist!"

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